All posts by Fr Tom Tirman

Reading for pizza…….

Yep, there was nothing cool for us as children in my generation.  Sure there was TV, and even color TV in fact, but there also was no cable vision.  And we as children were really more of antenna (or aerial) adjusters and remotes for the TV our parents watched just those three channels on.  We played soldiers, but with not a lot of money, sticks were our guns and pine cones our grenades. We also all played sports with old gear, and things like stop signs and man hole covers were bases, small piles of snow were our goals.  And doing school work was our JOB and there was really little incentive to do more…..we were just kids.

But tonight my youngest, Ben, ate a pizza he earned for reading extra books from the library, and that little rat ate it right in front of me.  I will confess that I suppose me and my childhood friends might have read more too if someone put pizza on the line, but there was never anything that cool, and had there been we would have been quite suspicious
!  In my day (to sound like my dad) we went out to eat as a treat and treats were pretty rare.  We had nothing electronic and just had to rely on old fashioned playing and our imaginations. And even though  I may not have ever earned a pizza (EVER in my life), I did have the privilege to skate on the ice with some of the greatest hockey players of all time (although this was completely contained in our neighborhood minds) and these same young men also were the very ones who liberated more people in the name of freedom than John Wayne did in movies (although this was also just in our minds).  But you need to remember that we were the same generation that “Pong” was released to, and we thought it to be a scientific marvel.

But I have no regrets growing up when I did, as I really do appreciate the blessings it gave me.  Yeah, it wasn’t as “cool” as everything is today, but I will take it anyway because to me it has meaning and continues to provide me life lessons.

As an example, I posted something on Facebook the other day about my struggling to make some important decisions in my life when one of my childhood friends, Sean O’Shea (yes, he might just be Irish) posted this.   He said, “Look at it from a hockey perspective, you’re bearing dow on the goalie and you see no viable shot, with some patience and a good deek the right window opens up and bam you score!!”

That I got……….what I don’t get is my iPhone.  We just got experience and that I will keep and cherish. Today’s kids get the pizza, and quite honestly they can have it!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Seeking Inspiration in All the Wrong Places……..

Oh the incredible irony!  I came home this evening, prayed (as I promised) for those who posted to my blog concerning prayer, and then decided to find a picture before I wrote as I am just plain tired.  I really wasn’t flight over fright, I was just whooped.

As my life often turns out, I noticed on my desktop and folder entitled “Inspirational,” which I knew to be a folder where I put inspirational pictures.  What a blessing, at least until I clicked it open……it was empty!

My electronic life has just not been going too well since my hard drive had to be replaced and restored early last year.  I do know I have most everything I need back on the new drive, it’s just finding it that is the problem.  Plus, after a certain age (25 for me) you not only really get cranked out of shape by these wild goose chases, but quite honestly I do not know what that even means!

Oh I wish life were as easy as what it seems, but if that were the case following recipes would all look like the pictures and we’d all be buff by just working out less than five minutes per year.  It just doesn’t work that way…..some people just say it does.

So to sell it like it is, please enjoy this gratuitous picture of my daughter Stephanie and I.  She is my oldest, a SENIOR in college majoring in CHEMISTRY.  She is also now 22, and is the one on the left.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Observations on prayer…….

There’s a line at the end of Confession, where the priest whereupon releasing the penitent, says to him/her “Go in peace, and pray for me, a sinner.”  So it is not uncommon for a man such as myself, to ask for prayers, even outside of Confession.

And of course I did that today and did it via a posting on Facebook.  I really just felt the need to ask for prayers, and yet it released a firestorm of attention to me that was really not all that necessary.  In fact, there is not any type of a crisis, I am just a bit stuck in making a few decisions I need to make, but it did turn out to be pretty helpful as it drew me deeper into thinking about prayer.

You know I have said for years that we as a society, even in the Church, pray like we are taking an aspirin, (yes that dates me as aspirin now is a preventive pill for old people’s hearts like mine) But we used to take it when we had headaches and pains, a lot like people take Tylenol or Advil now.  But we would not ever take any of it if nothing were wrong, and that’s sort of the way over the course of my ordained ministry I have found people engaging in personal prayer……when something is wrong or when they need something.  And the majority of the time when people have asked me to pray for them, it has reflected just that.  Mine was really not a “need” as much as just a “want.”

So I guess I am saying that I really shouldn’t be surprised at the reaction.  I just happened to be signed on to Facebook saying Happy Birthday to those who’s birthdays pop up on my screen, and just felt led to do ask, but I am fine.  No one is sick, our kids are fine, and I am as young, tall, handsome and delusional as ever.  (Don’t pray for any of that to change!) It just wanted to share with and feel the presence of others as I sought some answers.  And I truly am blessed by the concern.

So as an offer, give it a try.  If you comment on this or like it after I post the link on Facebook in a few minutes, I will pray for you.  You don’t have to need anything, and your life doesn’t have to have a crisis of any kind.  Just connect and I will pray for you.

But also, if you DO have something specific, message me if it is more personal, or post it if it is not, and I will pray specifically about that for you.  I just want to practice what I preach and I thank you all for your care and concern.

Tonight’s picture is one of my favorites and is NOT my cat….just a picture I found that made me laugh.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Give me a BLT, but hold the sanity…….

Yes, I missed posting yesterday, but it was not without intention.  Sometimes I just have too much on my plate, and that is something I have worked hard to rectify.  Eating it all makes for easy cleanup but an unhealthy body and spirit.  I therefore left what I started on my computer last night (this is not it) and revisited it this morning.  I erased it all, and it is all good to borrow a line from Scotty Tirman.

But tonight I am back at it.  Amanda has yet another Thirty-one gathering and Ben and I (and Viper) did the whole guy-thing with the cat just ignoring us all.  After all, that is what cats do.  But we made dinner, he took a bath-er or a show-ath, depending upon your perspective and we generally enjoyed our night together as Tirman males.

AND, I am happy to report that we and the house sustained no (significant) damage in her short absence from us.  (yes, I am surprised by that) And she will arrive home shortly with Ben, Viper, and the cat in bed, and me just hoping to get there.  Oddly enough, I got a lot done tonight which was not my prediction as he was rather chatty before she left and I figured that would continue on…..it didn’t.

But the highlight of my evening, and perhaps my week was Ben wanting me to come into the dining room and see his creation.  You see, he is currently grounded from his iPad and the TV.  He generally likes to play a few games after his homework is done (our rule, not his desire) but lost that privilege due to misbehavior.  We had a long talk about this yesterday in which he told me it wasn’t his fault as he got his bad behavior from the 19 years he did in “jeuvy,” (he apparently just got out).   I just looked at him with amazement and thought, “wow, all three of my kids are weird.”  He was my last hope (Scotty is just the prototype of Ben, but I had to kick Steph out of the house as a kid to go PLAY….her idea of fun was to stay inside and do math problems).

Anyway, since he can’t play a game electronically, he DREW a game on paper……Angry Birds, and as I watched him explain it he did sound effects.  He seems to get around any discipline I can dish out and enjoys himself.  Life better get ready for this one.

But I suppose I really should not be surprised.  His emotions are controlled and calculated.  After all he had developed them in almost two full decades in jeuvy………13 years of which were apparently prenatal.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless.

Tommy+

And then there was one……

The whirlwind tour is over with Scotty leaving this morning for California signaling the end of his leave.  As of the posting of this entry his trip has finished and he is back on base.  We are all pretty sad to say that it is over, for although we only had a few days with all three kids together, we did get to spend significant amounts of time with all of them.

Tomorrow however regular life restarts.  Ben has school, days become routine again, and my truck and the dog will be almost constantly with me.  And although I really do love the routine and predictability of my days, and although hanging with our (really Scotty’s) dog is pretty fun, and although (at third one) having my truck always available makes my life very smooth, I would trade it all in a minute to have them all here again.  The chaos is the challenge, but seeing the dog bag me means one of the kids is around and that makes me happy.  And I’d gladly never drive that truck again if they lived here where I could see them all the time and be what others call “inconvenienced.”

Tonight’s picture is of this morning at the airport.  I realized tonight that I am rarely in any of them as I take most of them.  But I also realized that, to me at least, most of my pictures are really great (because someone is arriving or we are doing something together) or they really suck (because we are saying goodbye) like tonight’s picture.  I suppose it is harder for my future daughter in law to see him go, and I am willing to admit that, but it doesn’t make it any less difficult.

The routine for me will help.  I am sure my dad can explain how to walk through it too.  But for now I will be thankful for the one still here.  

Great times, great kids.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless.


Tommy+

Telling it like it is……..

Amanda held her first Thirty-one party tonight and Ben and I hung out a few miles away at the Panera until it was over.  Yes, we were her chauffeurs.

Thirty-one is an interesting thing.  Amanda does not need to be any more busy as she has more than a full-time position with her company,
but she bought some of their stuff last year, and heard about their company (it is a Christian company that makes bags for women based on Proverbs 31) and she was just drawn to it.  She loves the stuff and she seems very excited about doing it.  And of course when that happens, we just stay out of the way.  We are all just thankful that it is not some home project!

But Ben and I had a few hours to kill so we first went to the Sam’s Club in Greenwood where I was surprised that were were not kicked out or arrested as we appeared to be the only people in the store not wearing Indianapolis Colts gear.  (It really was eerie)  But we made it out of there alive somehow and headed for the nearest Panera where he swore he would not just look at his Ipad, but eat dinner. (Incidentally he was wrong and ended up with his Ipad next to me while I watched him wolf down his food.

The interesting part was that I programed in our family in his contacts, and what tonight’s picture is showing is he and his grandma Skyping after he had eaten.  He did not disappoint.  During dinner I could hardly hear him.  He was mumbling.  But when he was Skying EVERYONE heard him.  Six year olds have some sort of sensor that kicks up their volume in small or public places and another sensor that sees you concentrating and then takes away their ability to be quiet, even when you plead, threaten, or bribe.  Now I am sure I never did such things at six and you could ask my mom if she were still living, or my dad, but at 77 we will just label him confused on such questions.  After all, I remember it like yesterday.

But the day is done, we are home and as I type this we are less than 10 hours from sending Scotty back off to Camp Pendleton in California.  The next time he will be home for sure is before the wedding. Steph will have graduated college by then and it is up in the air as to where she will be.  Home would be great, but I remember that choice not even being on my radar after graduating….by my choice.  I wanted to “superesse diem” (survive the day)

But it will all work itself out in the end I suppose, and in all these things I am but a helper……In the words of Mongo “I am just a pawn in the game of life.”  So be it.  At least I can get five hours sleep tonight.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Of things Tirman……..

If I was just bright enough to take a picture tonight I would have been able to post a picture of our family, with everyone but my daughter Stephanie (back at school) and my brother Mike who was not home yet at a restaurant having dinner with Scott and Kenzie as Scotty leaves back for duty on Sunday morning.  An intelligent man would have done so, and actually probably even a not too bright guy would have too.  I clearly was not all there.

But we did have a nice time, and it signals (as this dinner always does) three things.  One, Scotty is very close to returning to the Marines.  Two, I am very close to getting use of my truck back.  And three, the dog will soon be saying to me “Where have you been?”  (His world is pretty much Scott when he is home).  And this gathering, always with a variation of these amazingly good-looking, brilliant, and genetically-gifted people (yeah, thanks dad) always takes place as someone is heading back to where they are living.

For me however, (since I delusionaly believe you should be interested is how it is about me) it reflects something I have really known my whole life……..I have a pretty great family.  As a kid I remember going to things among many other Tirmans (cousins and aunts and uncles) and being amazed at how I felt.  As time passed however my generation grew, dispersed and the gatherings were different…..not all the same ones, and I thought it to be over. What I have come to see is that growing and being away is just part of it.  It really was a process of division as this is recreated over and over.  In a way it is a lot like what we SHOULD do in planting churches….plant, grow, divide, plant new, grow, divide and repeat.  In other words, my dad was not at the table with his brothers.  His parents are now gone, as are his aunts and uncles.  He now sits at the table as the Patriacrh.  Of his five children,  two were there, my sister Anna and me.  Mike was not there this time although we thought he would make it.  Our sisters Steph and Sarah we were not expecting as they are hanging with all our other deceased relatives in heaven.

In time however I know I will sit at a table, sans dad, Mike and Anna.  Dad will be gone, I will be dad at my own table with Scott, Steph, and Ben and their children.  Mike and Anna will do the same.  You see, it is not something that ever goes away, it just recreates itself. And it is life and it is pretty cool.

When I was a kid, my Uncle Wally used to tell me I should always be proud to be a Tirman, and although I thought I understood why, I never really got it.  It took me awhile to really get it, but as I did it was exciting to move into my place within it.   You see, he was right, and I am proud.  And gatherings like this just reinforce that.

And next week my dad and I will meet for lunch or breakfast and probably fondly reminisce abut it too.  We meet now regularly as he is old and I am getting older and he is mentoring me in moseying and other old people things.  We both are AARP eligible and it’s just all part of it.  And in truth, for what it is (meaning I only wish we could bring back those I miss) I would not want it any other way.

So tonight please accept my apology for the lack of a picture from last night and enjoy an old picture I have posted before of ALL the Tirmans who will be sitting around a table with me.  Yes, he is my favorite patriarchal picture!

Goodnight my friends and God Bless.

Tommy+

Bulldogs get your paws up!!!!

Yes, I know this is a second shot of an event over the holiday, but it does express how Ben, as a true Lapel Bulldog (how convenient I went to Butler so the Bulldog theme fits) felt to find out this afternoon that school has ONCE AGAIN been cancelled.  Yep, he got an additional week off.  And the ever popular Lapel Elementary song “Bulldogs Get Your Paws Up” is probably being sung today all over our community……by everyone but the parents.

But I am happy for him.  Scotty is still home for another few days, Kenzie is around too, and it really IS like a vacation to him.  Of course if things keep going his way he will never get out of first grade, but the good news is that  he seems quite content with the possibility (as I am sure most of his friends are as well).

This however takes me back to growing up in what was then a small place, Mishawaka, Indiana.  Of course we had school too and I won’t make up any stories like we had to walk to school 5 miles up his everyday and both ways (I will leave those stories to my dad’s generation) but we did have snow.  And here is the big tada in all of it, when it snowed WE WENT TO SCHOOL.  Whether it was just 4 inches (summer) or 16 feet (the rest of the year), our Superintendent would wake up, get a coffee, walk to the front door of his house, open it up, see nothing but white and think “What a wonderful day to go to school!”  He did this of course for two reasons, one, on this issue he was clearing incapable of saying the word “no.” And two, he was from my dad’s generation and clearly projecting.  Either way where I grew up you would wake up and think, “I wonder if I have school today,” and then you would laugh hysterically.  It was just like living in Wisconsin, but without Aaron Rodgers.

Anyway, thankfully I am able to hang with him all day.  I am now a Lapel Bulldog parent, but will forever be a Beiger Junior High School Bulldog and a Butler Bulldog too.  And I will get my paws up along with him.  After all, I am a kid at heart and a snow day is a snow day for whoever gets it! Congratulations Bulldogs, you finally have accomplished that of which we never able.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+

Crazy……

It’s just another day here at the Tirman home.  My wife is working, I am avoiding being in the way, and Ben is clearly studying Quantum Physics.  Only a real boss could read such things with a silly straw behind his ear like a pencil.  His grandma sent us this one.  He looks pretty studious.

But don’t kid yourselves, it is most probably a ruse.  Ben is about 123% dedicated to goofing or slacking off and there is a very clear and discernible difference. PLUS we cannot discount that there may be something going on with Ben and his grandma.  They are always in cahoots about something and this odd duck attire just may be part of a larger more fun filled thing they are planning.  After all, she took the picture.

He however is still on a pretty tight leash here, and when I say tight leash here I mean only when we can catch him.  Each day is different from the rest. And although we miss the sweet little easy going guy a lot, he just continues t get better and better.  These are always hard weeks.  Steph had to leave but misses him.  Scotty will be leaving Sunday.  And soon it it back to just the three of us (which we define as living life without backup)  We will however survive.

But is a been a busy week……no school means no rest….and no rest means doing a lot.  It  is a great blessing though to have any or all the kids around.  Ben is not my first rodeo and the other two have turned out fine (okay, maybe not Scott…but Kenzie keeps him in line)  I know we are just thankful for them all, crazy ear pencils and all…..because they wouldn’t be real Tirmans if a little crazy wasn’t part of the description.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+  

Making plans………..

It may “look” like an intelligent conversation, but it is not.  Conversation implies a two-way street, and one of them is not talking.  And I will also confess that this is NOT a posed picture as cats cannot and will not pose for anything.  It is just one of those moments that the cat must have found chicken nugget or macaroni and cheese breath worth her time.

But these two are pals.  Our cat “Puddy” (like pudding) has actually mellowed with age.  She is 11 now, but at one time was most probably the meanest cat (or animal) at our vet’s practice.  And after paying to have all four paws declawed, they still got her out of the carrier wearing welding gloves.  She is about 6 pounds of pure fire, and is not to be trifled with.

Ben however loves her, and she Ben.  She sleeps on his bed every night and it is probably meant to be a witness to how tough she is as taking any kind of rest with Ben (whether a nap or when he sneaks into our room) is about as comfortable as sleeping with a zip-tied bag of wet squirrels….he is always moving.

Oh sure he looks sweet in those fake glasses, and sure Puddy looks all docile, but it is an illusion.  These two are the modern day equivalents of “Pinky and the Brain” with no Pinky, two brains, and a lot more ill intent.  He will talk you out of anything he wants and if you don’t comply she’ll bite you. And the scary part is that the two of them hang together.  It is Sharknado at its best, just with fur and delusion.

But if I didn’t have this to write about, what topic could I choose?  The world of these two is pretty cool, and I love walking in it……..at least for as long as they let me.

Goodnight my friends and God Bless!

Tommy+